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The everybody needs a massage surfline drive eroticeUnited States Women's National Team (USWNT) advanced to the Round of 16 of the World Cup in the wee hours of Tuesday morning, which, taken at face value would be an obviously good thing. But this is the USWNT — perhaps the most dominant U.S. sports team — and expectations are lofty.

They barely advanced via a disappointing 0-0 draw with Portugal, coming literal inches from being eliminated in what would have been a disastrous result for the top-ranked squad. That result, paired with milquetoast defeat of Vietnam and skin-of-their-teeth tie with Netherlands — well, it's been a decidedly mediocre tournament for a team expected to deliver excellence.

Analysts and fans are, understandably, quite frustrated by the performance. So some people did not take kindly to the players being jovial, dancing, and greeting fans with selfies after the match. And by some people, I particularly mean former USWNT great Carli Lloyd and Fox Sports soccer commentator Rob Stone. They blasted the team on air just after the nail-biting draw with Portugal.

Stone noted: "These are not the images we should be expecting to see of a team that survived Portugal and survived to get to the Round of 16."

He then tee'd up Lloyd, who was on the desk as a commentator. She stung the hardest with her commentary.

"I have never witnessed something like that," Lloyd said. "There's a difference between being respectful of the fans and saying hello to your family, but to be dancing and smiling...I mean the player of that match was the post.," she said, referring to a near-goal from Portugal that struck the post. "You're lucky to not being going home right now."

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This sparked lots of posts on social media about the new crop of stars being more focused on TikTok dancing and being stars, rather than winning. The team, Lloyd, and other related terms trended on X (née Twitter).

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See, lots of the players on the USWNT, like just almost all other athletes, are on TikTok. Sometimes they have posted fun dances or looked cool in cool outfits. And they had the absolute gall to...take selfies with fans that flew all the way to New Zealand to watch them play. And then they danced! After...advancing in a win-or-go-home tournament.

First things first, we should acknowledge Lloyd is hardly a neutral observer. Dave Zirin of The Nation wrote a comprehensive article noting that her attack of the team is both personal and political. While a USWNT legend, an embittered Lloyd has repeatedly slammed the new generation, saying some players were more focused on "building a brand" and courting endorsements. As the sole player to not kneel to protest racism at the Tokyo Olympics, some people saw her repeated criticisms of the team's culture as thinly veiled shots at progressive members of the squad. She denied that's what she meant.

Far be it from me to imply I know more about soccer than Lloyd — she is an all-time great and I played on a bad Division 3 team — but I find it hard to believe dancing, or TikToks, or selfies is the reason the team is underperforming. In fact, if anything, they've done the gritty, unsexy parts of the game well. They've defended well and allowed just a single goal in the tournament. If anything scoring goals at all costs would be the me-first thing to do. And yet, in this tournament, it's almost as if the team is incapable of generating goals. I suspect some mix of tactics, randomness of performance day-to-day, and sure, maybe some complacency would be at play. I'll leave the actual soccer analysis to CBS soccer analyst Mike L. Goodman.

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In some ways, though, the fact that this controversy exists at all goes to show how the sports world has come in talking about the U.S. women's soccer. Male athletes have long had to defend having an interest in literally anything else besides winning a game — so much so that LeBron James invented the incomprehensible phrase "Zero Dark Thirty-23" to basically alert that he was shutting down his social media for the NBA playoffs.

It's difficult for fans to understand, or for analysts to explain, the intricacies of a match that might explain why it went one way or the other. What's easier is to rail against the team dancing.

I bet if the USWNT win their next match — a win-or-go-home Round of 16 game — they'll dance. And everyone will love it.