【Pachinko Angel】
Let’s Watch Father Carve This Handsome Bird
Our Daily Correspondent
This vintage video from the U.S. Department of Agriculture actually gives a very good primer on carving—frankly, it’s the best guide I’ve found, and the thigh-meat trick is indeed neat, even if the announcer’s chummy tone can grate. (Be sure to watch long enough to hear him intone, “There goes that drumstick for a hungry boy!”)
But it raises other questions. Mainly: What is “turkey time,” and why is it separate from “carving time”? Best of all is the rather menacing, passive-aggressive coda: “You can carve without these directions, but you can probably carve better with them.” As a random drunk in a bar once slurred at me when I said I didn’t want to go to the pier with him, “Fine, whatever, just thought you might want to see the Statue of Liberty!”
Don’t do me any favors, turkey-carvers of America. If you want to eat hacked-off hunks of meat, it’s your funeral! Whatever!
Sadie Stein is contributing editor of The Paris Review, and the Daily’s correspondent.
Search
Categories
Latest Posts
This is the fattest of the extremely fat bears
2025-06-26 07:42How to livestream Kansas State vs. Michigan State
2025-06-26 06:44Help us, Star Wars coronavirus memes. You're our only hope.
2025-06-26 06:24New Zealand puts millions into helping teens cope with breakups
2025-06-26 06:08Q&A with tendercare founder and CEO Shauna Sweeney
2025-06-26 05:15Popular Posts
Phoebe Waller
2025-06-26 07:14How to adapt if you've moved in with your parents due to coronavirus
2025-06-26 07:12Wordle today: Here's the answer, hints for March 24
2025-06-26 07:07Featured Posts
Bargaining For the Common Good
2025-06-26 07:56The coronavirus test isn't as scary as it looks
2025-06-26 07:48Wordle today: Here's the answer, hints for March 22
2025-06-26 07:17Best Apple deal: Save $19 on AirTag 4
2025-06-26 05:30Popular Articles
Ireland fines TikTok $600 million for sharing user data with China
2025-06-26 07:57How to livestream Gonzaga vs. UCLA in the Sweet 16 matchup
2025-06-26 06:52How to last longer in bed
2025-06-26 06:32FAU vs Tennessee livestream: How to watch the Sweet 16
2025-06-26 06:28Watch how an old Venus spacecraft tumbled before crashing to Earth
2025-06-26 05:48Newsletter
Subscribe to our newsletter for the latest updates.
Comments (386)
Elite Information Network
Your 'wrong person' texts may be linked to Myanmar warlord
2025-06-26 07:55Mark Information Network
Why are there so many stock photos of people kissing while wearing face masks?
2025-06-26 07:44Mark Information Network
Apple's iOS 16.4 has a cool feature that can make cellular calls better
2025-06-26 06:02Reality Information Network
Neighbours doing 'socially distant dancing' on their street will warm your heart
2025-06-26 06:01Exquisite Information Network
What cracked the Milky Way's giant cosmic bone? Scientists think they know.
2025-06-26 05:29